The phrase "University of Life" is often misinterpreted to be a cheeky retort given to someone who is boasting they have an academic degree from a well known university.
The reality is the University of Life is a very powerful mindset that should be applied to every moment you experience.
By remaining aware that you are being schooled by life at all times, you will start to see your daily world in a more wonderous way and benefit from it.
The key to passing each stage of the University of Life is to know which degree you are studying.
The good news is there really is only one degree course which you should be taking and it is called: "Positivity".
Every moment you encounter, you should constantly be asking yourself one ultimate question:
1. What positives can I pull out of this moment to help me (and or others) feel and do better right now and in the future.
Let me give you an example from my real life situation.
Like many of us in the world, the last tens years of life, for me, has and is getting tougher and tougher (NB: Positivity Translation: Life for me is bringing me some wonderful challenges that are helping shape me into a better person who can get the best out of life to feel at peace with himself).
It began 10 years ago when I lost my wife to a sudden and nasty divorce.
Every year that went by after my divorce something would then happen to make life "appear" worse.
Examples of these "somethings" are:
- Reaching 40 and being hit by the "I am growing old where did my life go" bug, I have watched my hair thin, seen wrinkles appear
- I haven't found a new partner (yet)
- I have felt alone
- I found my agoraphobia resistance under extreme pressure as COVID lockdowns stopped me integrating with society
- I had a best friend die suddenly
- Add Brexit (not saying I am for or against just fed up with people arguing), then COVID, then the Ukraine war...
- Oh and then I lost my freedom and became a carer for my 92 year old dad. I haven't even scratched the surface of the "somethings" that have happened to me over the last decade.
Crucially! I have made myself aware that these life events are an education.
I have been lucky to have been schooled by life in so many ways I could never have foreseen.
The most important thing is, to always ask myself the degree passing question:
1. What positives can I pull out of this moment to help me (and or others) feel and do better right now and in the future.
With that question in mind I can relook at the things I have listed and in the present moment bring a new feeling of positivity.
Let me run through that list again:
- I lost my wife 10 years ago to a sudden and nasty divorce: Positivity Lesson [Passed]: To use the old famous phrase from Alfred Lord Tennyson, "tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all"! Some people never find love. I also had the most amazing daughter because of that relationship, any amount of pain is worth having her in my life! THANK YOU TO LIFE FOR THIS HUMBLING EXPERIENCE X
- Reaching 40 and being hit by the "I am growing old where did my life go" bug, I have watched my hair thin, seen wrinkles appear: Positivity Lesson [Passed]: I am so lucky to have lived to 40 and seen my family grow old with me. I have been in good health and have some good memories to call upon. If I imagine I was 80 now and someone said they had a magic wand that could make me turn into my 40 year old self, I would say yes please - and guess what I am that age right now so WOW the magic trick worked - I am enjoying it! I am always going to be younger and feel better than my future self.
- I haven't found a new partner (yet) have felt alone: Positivity Lesson [Passed]: I am an introvert and on my own I find peace. Through being alone I found my dog who I love so much, her unconditional love can never be equalled; what more do I need right now? Okay there are some things but I am being positive hahahaha...
- I found my agoraphobia resistance under extreme pressure as COVID lockdowns stopped me integrating with society: Positivity Lesson [Passed]: I have learnt so much from this situation about how desensitising myself (i.e. not being able to go to public places as much) does make me more anxious, but that quandary in itself proves I can face my fears and again cure myself of agoraphobic feelings. From this experience I am able to live the life that suits me most and makes me feel at peace.
- I had a best friend die suddenly: Positivity Lesson [Passed]: My friend's death has opened my eyes up to living life right now, do not put things off, make the most of just breathing air and using your senses, it doesn't have to be about me running off to a mountain or wherever I "think" happiness exists, life is happening right now, right here, even as I type this I am grateful for being able to write. I am so thankful for knowing him and I know he is still somewhere and we are connected. Knowing him throughout school and work has been a pleasure and I am lucky to have him as a friend.
- Brexit (not saying I am for or against just fed up with people arguing), then COVID, then the Ukraine war: Positivity Lesson [Passed]: I am determined to think that because the latter are challenges all of the world are facing that they will wake the world up to the way countries are managed and bring about a new way of managing the world that will make everyone feel better about their lives.
- Oh and then I lost my freedom and became a carer for my 92 year old dad: Positivity Lesson [Passed]: This one is an easy one - I LOVE HIM! He is my hero and I cherish every moment with him, even the ones where I want to scream like a teenager wanting to get their freedom hahaha... I LOVE HIM and that is all I need to cope with the situation. I am happy to help him through his final years and feel honoured to do so.
I hope my raw examples have shown you how your life lessons will help you graduate the University of life day after day, starting now. Look around you and ask yourself the question!
Remember, every moment is wonderful. Especially the challenging ones; you just have to pull out the positives because they are always there! Once you know where to find them they will appear more easily and fill your improved life with contentment.
Take care today.
Author: Christian Jacques Bennett*
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