My notes on the Tony Robbins Unshakable 5 day challenge

Christian Jacques Bennett Blog

Here are my notes following this post I wrote yesterday:


  • People judge who we are by what we do
  • Anything you attach words I AM to and speak insistently and emotionally enough you will become that
  • Identity.. act like the person you want to become
  • Complexity is the enemy of execution. In other words, keep things simple and do the obvious ASAP without procrastination.
    • Draw triangle and put STATE in it. Side 1. Change Physiology first, do something physical to feel like the person you want to be, like exercise or sing or laugh. Side 2. Change your Focus, think of something that will make you feel like the person you want to be (good memories, successes)... Side 3 Change your WORDS, your language and meaning, say positive things, encouraging etc.
  • Add circle around triangle.. 2 factors whether you'll change your state... 1 CREATE A COMPELLING FUTURE.... 2 IDENTITY SHAPES YOUR CHOICES
  • People get rewarded in public what you practice in private consistently
  • Your goals affect you what ever they are... If your goal or focus is to get through the day you'll feel crap, if your goal is to give someone a gift you'll feel excited.
  • As part of identity you create a BRAND, you represent a brand by the things you say or actions you do.
  • Beliefs create, beliefs destroy
  • Strongest force is needed to stay consistent with how we define ourselves
  • How do we know who we are? By knowing who we're not.
  • My brand, kind, lover, helper, doer, improver, positive...
  • Your story is driven by your identity
    • 1 understand your identity
    • 2 identify and articulate your competitive advantage
    • 3 practice communicating congruently
    • 4 LIVE IT!
    • 5 market yourself! Show and tell others your brand.
  • CHALLENGE:
    • 1. What's your old and new unique identity
    • 2. How can you expand on it this year
    • 3. How will this change your life
  • Sara Blakely - How do you find something that you are passionate about? Ask yourself, what makes you cry?
  • Make offers that are irresistable
  • Learn what season you are in... Spring Summer Autumn or Winter ... Then act accordingly to get the best out of it and be ready for the other seasons, Winter being the one that needs to use up the profits you made in the other better weather months (proverbially!)
  • Self doubt is the number one factor that stops people achieving their goals, you have to believe you are worthy of your dreams
  • If you had no FAILURE or FEAR OF REJECTION what would you do? Not having these will save and improve your life.
  • Change the meaning you attach to fear and failure to something self improving
  • Rejection gives you a new opportunity which you would not have got if you had got what you "thought" you wanted
  • Relationships... There's no failure in having a relationship as you always learn something new
  • What's inside our head creates our life
  • You should always take 100 percent responsibility in a relationship, knowing you are always able to make changes to be a great partner if you remain responsible for your actions
  • Be aware of your energy levels in a relationship, both should aim for helping each other remain at the higher level ie being enthusiastic about each other like when you first met... Be aware of the state you are showing your partner, market yourself constantly as your best self, don't get complacent
  • State and meaning are active but standards provide the fuel, set yourself high standards
  • The human mind distorts deletes and generalises life experience, aka you are only aware of a small amount of everything, such as you are not likely thinking about your clothes touching your skin right now until it was mentioned, in other words you only ever live life through what you are focusing on in that moment so why not choose good things
  • What makes a relationship work is having things in common
    • The Gottmans couple who are love analysts have learnt 4 key things that mess up relationships... 1 criticism, it lowers the energy 🤔 solution, use positive questions instead, stay kind and explain how something makes you feel rather than direct criticism at others, show admiration, use unarguables... 2 contempt, being sinical, sarcasm, belittling etc (number factor leading to divorce) 🤔 solution, show appreciation, gratitude... 3 defensiveness, making excuses, not opening up to mistakes, reversing blame 🤔 solutions, take responsibility, see their perspective, apologize... 4 stonewalling, withdrawal, shutting down, acting busy, engaging in distracting behaviours, giving off the impression you don't want to be with them 🤔 solution, change your state, take time to get yourself in a good frame of mind and perspective.
  • Relationship success comes from the sum of all the latter good things you constantly think and do for your partner and vice versa.
  • You can only argue if you communicate something arguable
  • SEW = Inarguable ... 1 sensation, say I'm feeling this about this, what you feel about something rather than think about something... 2 emotion, let them know your emotional state... 3 what you want, tell them this so there's no confusion moving forward.
  • It's important to always keep the flame of the relationship alive, eg if you have kids the parents must always take priority and be the rock that is unshakable for the children, there should always be us time.
  • The 3 U s you should not feel.. 1 Unseen... 2 Not Understood... 3 Unsafe...
  • The 3 C s you should not feel... 1 criticized... 2 closed off from what you are going through and doing... 3 controlled, if you love them set them free.
  • Note you can also score the latter to see how your relationship is doing, using -10 for each if negative and +10 for each positive. So an ideal relationship should be +60.
  • Stacking Effect - Tony's way to stack all of the things we have learnt over the last few days about State, Ego etc... this builds you to be "Unshakable".
  • Brian Bradley is the guy who started off the webinars with some exercises, here is his video: https://youtu.be/tkkjFyFYQXE
  • Here is the Become Unshakable package https://becomeunshakeable.com/transformation-package
  • Don't accept limitations - if you hear excuses of why you cannot do something that is exactly WHEN you SHOULD DO IT!
  • What do you want to do that will change your life the most? What 2 actions could you do RIGHT NOW to get you closer to achieving that? Remember, actions create momentum, after doing 2 you will want to do 3 and so on 4, 5, 6... etc.....
  • The only thing keeping me from getting what I really want is the story I keep telling myself (my belief) - so change the story to match your goals. Beliefs (the story) create whilst limiting beliefs will destroy.
  • Stories of limitation are usually about time and money....
  • Ultimately everything Tony is telling you to do is.... get yourself energized and focused and take actions to gain momentum every day to achieve what you want to achieve. Note this is all captured in FEEL4!
  • Learned Helplessness... The 3 P s: 1 Being PERVASIVE (letting the wrong belief spread throughout your whole life and physiology)... 2 Thinking negative things are PERMINANT... 3 Making your whole situation PERSONAL and terminal - it isn't and always can change.
  • It is not enough to understand or know you can change your situation, you have to take action and get energized to do so.
  • What belief has got in your way / or is getting the way?
  • What is the limiting belief that HAS to go?
  • What has this belief cost you?
  • What is total BS about this belief, why is it not true!?
  • What is a new belief that will set you free, what is the opposite of the BS?
  • The truth is you CAN do what you want, you are UNSTOPPABLE just as long as you believe this to be true and keep that belief!!
  • 5 Core Actions to create and extraordinary life:
    • 1: Get clear on what you really want and where you really are
    • 2: Crush, destroy, annihilate and replace any story of limitation
    • 3: Watch your language (the words you attach to your experience become your experience)
    • 4: Massive action is the cure all - if you try something that does not work, then try something else! Something WILL get you to where you want to go. Tip: if you want to take MASSIVE ACTION you MUST DO IT whilst you are in the RIGHT STATE of mind and feel energised - DO NOT DELAY - DO IT NOW.
    • 5: Always give FAR more than you expect to receive (this helps your brand), aka go beyond your best when doing something so people notice in a good way
  • When things are going bad there is always some good that comes from it, find and use that good to propel you to something better
  • The words you attach to your experience become your experience
  • Your words will change other people's states too
    • Exercise: 1. What are three emotional patterns that don't serve you? 2. Make a list of words you use when you are angry and negative. 3. Come up with 2-3 replacement words, humorous ones, that can BREAK that pattern. Basically train your brain to replace negative words with positive ones to break your state and align it to a more positive one.
  • PROXIMITY IS POWER: In other words you need to get yourself located in the place your dream aligns too, eg if you want to dance in New York you need to move to... NEW YORK!
  • The only way your life changes is by taking BIG MOVES! Eg. If you want to work in a forest then move to the LANDES COUNTY PINE FOREST in France, the biggest forest in Europe, do not continue to live in London City centre.
  • HUNGER (being absolutely passionate) to do something will make you successful
  • The secret to living is giving
  • Dean Graziosi: https://www.deangraziosi.com/about/
  • MAPPING TOOL: If you want to change and achieve, you need to map it. You need a STARTING POINT (where are you now), you need and END POINT (where do you want to go). The trick is to start at the end point and IMAGINE from the start that you are looking back at the most amazing journey ever, one that improves you so much and makes you feel amazing, you need to know WHY DO YOU WANT TO GET TO YOUR DESTINATION? Next is HOW are you going to get to the destination? WHO has already got to the same destination? Can you copy them, or improve on what they did?
  • Fyi: Here's the Jamie Kern Lima Audible book: https://www.audible.co.uk/pd/Believe-It-Audiobook/1797118285?action_code=ASSGB149080119000H&share_location=pdp
  • Fyi: Spanx founder Sara Blakely https://spanx.com/pages/about-us
  • Bonus Video with Matthew McConaughey https://greenlights.com/
  • Tony says:
  • Your philosophy drives your success
  • Suffering is never based in the facts; it is based on our PERCEPTION of the facts
  • 5 Sanity Beliefs (for you to always be aware of in your gut instinct to recall)
    • 1. Everything changes and everything comes to an end (Creates an opportunity for new beginnings)
    • 2. Things don't always go according to plan (that's a fact)
    • 3. Life is not always fair
    • 4. Pain is part of life (suffering is a choice) - Use your PAIN to your advantage - Pain is part of change
    • 5. People are not always loving and loyal
  • "The quality of your life is in direct proportion to the amount of uncertainty you can comfortably live with"
  • "You get what you tolerate in yourself"
  • "Be a blessing and you will be blessed"
  • 1. Cognitive mastery (you have intellectual understanding, knowing is not enough)
  • 2. Emotional mastery (feel it, you know there are emotional consequences)
  • 3. Physical mastery (it is habitual)
  • Information without emotional consistency is lost
  • Repetition is the mother of mastery
  • Crisis = Breakthrough
  • What is the purpose of investment? One reason is "INCOME" (Income is the outcome)
  • Matthew M says:
  • How are you going to know right if you haven't done any wrong
  • Stepping in sh*t is inevitable - you need to reflect on how not to do it again
  • When your "Red" (eg someone dies, you lose your job) lights occur in life, you need to use them as the time to prepare for your change to Amber and Green
  • If you can find something that you need and want to do in life, then you will become unshakable!
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